The Come-Back

Dear Mentor,     

      I saw you coming, you saw me as well, but why did silence over rule everything.  You must admit you were rude enough to even ignore my presence.  I felt so bad, so bad that I stood like a stoned creature – yap, a lifeless masterpiece, yet unlike the pieces that forever stay where they stand, my heart moved me.  Yes, I have a heart – bleeding, crying. breaking when you, unlike those that beheld thee, refrained thy sight on me.

     Have I done any?  None, I suppose.  Is that how you reciprocate a longing feeling?  Is that how you quell a rebelling feeling?

     You have nothing against me, young man, but i have much against you.  Have you any right to do this to me?  I have swallowed my pride I have before.  This cannot be done always.  I will not this time.  My love must have consumed me, but my reasons are intact – so solid that cannot be broken by the strength you have.  Time changes – even so abruptly that you might be so wrong right now.

     I am not the same me that you know.  I am no longer the fragile me.  I am stronger, even stronger than you are.  I can fight now.  It is not a rebellion!  It is a revolution!

     You have won a lover in me before…now, you have won your worst enemy.  Bet ready to be defeated.  I will win this time.

I remember

Dear Mentor,   

      There was this man, I know

who stood there, and then

his silence spoke his all

his voice unheard all through

but his stares never berate.

Mystified, I am

     his presence shook me

On that same corner the next day

    I found,  the same him, i know

The same emotions flickered

    and him still unchanged.

Where are you??

  Dear Mentor,   

     The stars, I gared tonight

the gentle wind blew, that

    denied these tears

I have searched the day,

     the sun drenched my soul

     but, hope

has brought me here still

    searching for a trace of you

The pieces little by little

     you left, I see

That day ended, not a single

    shadow of yesterday, I found

The night is growing deeper

     and deeper and the stars are brightest

Will they light my way?

     to the end of you.

Something in the air

Dear Mentor,

It is pretty unusual

     that the coldness embraced

the air I breath, feel

     Summer has come and dwelled

the flowers withered, dried

     but still, and yet still

I am freezing

    Is there no warmth

no fire to ablaje?

     to stop this chill?

What wrong has been done

    to alter, to change, to modify

that which should be

      have not doen any

I have not changed

   could there be

something in the air?

I know him not

Dear Mentor,   

 

  I know him not, I know

His eyes are open and yet

     I see not his soul

his lips slumber

     words halted, the sounds void

Clear, the story I hear, but

     it does not pervade the air.

I hold his hands

     I felt none, the emotions bland.

These I sense, the totality

     I see him stand, the form -

the looks, the face, the configuration

but why?

     I know him not, stil …

First Love

Dear Mentor,

     Everyone has his first love.  Even the dullest or the ugliest individual may have the most fascinating or award-winning “first-love story.”  I, too, have my own story.

      It happened well to be exact, fourteen  (14) long years ago.  It may not be as exciting or as thrilling as others would have experienced it, but at least I have one to call my own.

      The memories came back to me like morning dews that freshen up a new day.  Yes, I saw the picture of him wearing the same smiles, the same spirited him I knew fourteen years ago.  Those same smiles caught me when I was still so young and so fragile…and it has still the same imprint in my memory…in my heart…

       I kid the feeling.  Not anyone knew this story.  For so long I kept the feeling I felt for him before, until now that I see again his face, unchanged…unaltered with the passing of time.  At least I can say at least I can carry a secret to the grave, but I think not this one, and yet still he never knew about it, and still does not know it.

     It took me fourteen years to write about it or even talk about it…and smile about it.  At least by now, after coming to age and realizing the impact it had on me through years, I can say it made my miserable life a little easy to live.

     I hope I have the chance to say it to him, tell the story, thank him for the inspiration for his smiles.  I have not founf someone smile as soulfully as he does, and for ten long years that I have not seen him, I hope I can meet him again and smile at him, for him to smile back at me the way it used to be. I am wishing again!

     At least for now, I am happy with the revelation – a secret worth revealinghas come out in the open…I hope it would reach him.  How?  I leave it to destiny or technology.  How will he react, I do not know.  What I can only hope for is that when he knows about it, he would still smile as soulfully as he usually does.

     That is a story worth telling. – If it is not, would it last that long?

 

Enchantress

 

From Where?

Dear Mentor,

 

 From where shall I -

     look for the pieces of me

Broken fragments left

     from your forgotten promises?

 

You left in whole

     and left me empty

The gusto of wind

     have shattered the pieces of me.

 

From where, I do not know.

     Will I seek the bits?

To pick little by little

     in my moments of loneliness

 

Will forever be enough

     to suffer this thirst

Quench this at once, I beg

     Destiny!   Return that which is lost.

 

I pray not to the moon

     for her to give back

the promises left unfulfilled

     to gather myself anew.

 

I shall search everywhere,

     To complete this broken self

I sahll start now, but

     From where, I know not.

Nothing to Hope For

Dear Mentor,

     Why do I continue purging myself and hoping.  I get what I consider my everything when afterall, there is nothing to hope for.

Hurting Ourselves

Dear Mentor,

     Why do we love hurting ourselves when we love still we know we will be hurt?

    

Cry Out Loud

Dear Mentor,

     I wanted to cry out loud with what I see but I have no voice to say what I feel, no courage, and no right to say it.